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The Colonel Chronicle


The Colonel Chronicle

The Colonel Chronicle

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How to Not Ask Questions


Picture yourself in a conversation, convinced that your wisdom surpasses all. Questions are for the lesser-informed,  So, confidently assume you know everything about the topic at hand.

Silence is Golden: Never speaking up or showing curiosity. Let awkward silence fill the room.

Instead of asking questions, nod and smile as if you don’t understand everything perfectly. Your nod will communicate your profound insight.

Who needs questions when you’re a mind-reading expert? Nonchalantly anticipate what others are thinking. Telepathy? Nah, just another day in the life of a genius.

If someone asks, “How’s your day?” reply with, “Oh, just perfect, I always enjoy Mondays!” No questions required.

Confidently state opinions as facts, and disregard any pesky alternative viewpoints. Remember, you’re the oracle of knowledge; others should be grateful for your wisdom.

Have you heard that “Questions only open the door to doubt?” Now you know if you didn’t. 

Wear your ignorance like a badge of honor, proudly declaring, “I have no idea what’s going on, and I’m proud!” Who needs facts when you have self-confidence?

In the face of new information, act disinterested, perhaps even pretend to lick your imaginary paw nonchalantly. After all, why bother with learning when you already know everything?

Whenever a question comes your way, respond with a joke. Who needs answers when you can have laughter?

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